(no subject)

[vaaa]

id guess the main reason the psychiatric system wants to bring me down.

is because im healthy now. better than ever.

and thats not allowed.

and i mentioned the greys a bunch of times and sounds and light spectacles happened.

and i didnt care. as usual. sigh.

im not angry anymore. and i drank a lot of coffee and didnt get angry.

and it worked after id slept.

thats not how it worked before.

i dont expect anyone to understand.

that things change.

no. theyre wrong.

"the more things change the more they stay the same"

oh. i guess thats correct.

everything looks the same. except my tatus (god bless them! [not]) looked black.

not blue not purple not ultra violette not radiant green.

and the nights all of a sudden turned pitch black. everything not directly illuminated.

just infinite darkness. worse than a cloudy night sky. sigh. so much to explain. to myself.

and dont brag. and dont talk about what youve heard.

all that you need is in your soul. makes sense.